Advice from Judith Martin, Nicholas Ivor Martin and Jacobina Martin.
At my husband’s 20-year reunion, I wrote “Sam’s wife” on my name tag. I knew that only three people there knew me, and that no one else would likely remember my name the following week -- they’d all refer to me as “Sam’s wife.” So I went with that.
The funny thing was that several times, I was scolded and told that I should “have my own identity” and so on.Miss Manners might have been tempted to say, “Well, I would have put my own name, but I’ve been married so long that I don’t remember what it is.” And then excused herself before the lecture about “being a person in your own right.”
I am asked, in both direct and indirect ways, whether I am pregnant. For instance, “Ooh, is your waistline expanding?” . Or just outright, “Are you pregnant?” I have tried responses such as “Oh, I don’t talk about that kind of thing at work,” which does not deter them. I have also tried denying it, sometimes to the disbelief of my patients, who argue with me about my status.
France Dernières Nouvelles, France Actualités
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