Advice: Dodging a friend to avoid her predatory dad
I had enough doubt and denial that I continued to pretend nothing happened for years. I was able to interact with my friend and deal with seeing her father on rare occasions I had to.
The past few years, this has become more and more difficult. When my friend calls or texts, I can’t stop thinking about what happened 10 years ago. I’m fearful her father is nearby, and I don’t want him to know anything about me. So I’ve stopped responding to her. She has started asking my family about me and continues to try to contact me. I don’t want to hurt her or make her think she did anything wrong. But I’m not comfortable telling her the truth. I’m afraid she’ll gaslight me. I’m afraid she’ll tell her family and they’ll all gaslight me.
The issue of your friend is important and worth exploring, but even with her persistence — some thoughts on that in a moment — it’s still not as urgent as your emotional health. That’s what your body is telling you with its repetitive thoughts. It’s asking you to get some help dealing with it and finding ways to feel safe again.
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