Secret marriage might appeal to some young Muslim students because the practice may seem like a way to stay religiously faithful, even if they’re not ready to get married for life.
In July, Adeel Zeb, the Muslim chaplain for the Claremont Colleges, near Los Angeles, posted on Facebook about something that was bothering him. “I have been approached by multiple Muslim couples recently to perform / lead their ‘secret, or sin, by having sex outside of marriage, which is prohibited by Islam. They wanted to get right with God by getting married—but they wanted to do so without telling their parents.
The post set off a flurry of discussion among his friends, many of whom lead influential Muslim organizations around the country. At its core, the conversation wasn’t just about secret marriage and the kind of religious loophole it seems to represent. Zeb and his community were grappling with how young Muslims should navigate sex, relationships, and marriage while remaining faithful to their religious obligations—and how the adults who guide them should think about their roles.
This question is in “an evolutionary moment right now,” Asifa Quraishi-Landes, a professor at the University of Wisconsin-Madison who studies Islamic constitutional theory, said. Recent publications have made an effort to explore the many kinds of relationships and marriages that Muslims experience, whether or not they are recognized according to traditional Islamic law.
Rabea Benhalim, an associate professor at the University of Colorado Law School, does not like the concept of secret marriage; she approaches her work from theperspective, one of the four schools of Sunni Islamic jurisprudence, which mandates that marriage be public. Instead, she believes that the barriers to entry and exit from marriage should be lowered. “There is no reason why a couple can’t say, ‘I want to try this. I want to be good with God.
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