Dear Care and Feeding: I'm worried something is going to go seriously awry here.
I married my best friend and soulmate, Caleb, at 19. We were entirely too young, it was impulsive, but it was the best decision I ever made. I’ve never regretted it. He was in the Army, so much of our marriage was spent apart, but I was never happier than when I was with him. We never had children, but shortly before his final deployment, we decided to freeze his sperm.
Using Caleb’s frozen sperm to have a child feels like a way to pick up where his life left off. I have a chance to have the life we thought we would have, even if he can’t be here for it. I don’t have a lot of contact with his family but if I’m going to do this, I want to build a relationship. Our child will be their grandchild.
The problem is that before we became more intentional in addressing these meltdowns, my husband used to get frustrated very easily during them and yell at her. But now when my daughter gets upset, she won’t let him anywhere near her. If he tries to approach her to empathize or comfort her, she runs to hide. I am the only one she’ll stay with if she’s melting down, because she thinks her dad will be mad at her.
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