'We are the lucky ones. We were chosen to be our children’s second parents — and we are honored by the fact that we get to raise our children day-to-day.'
But the stranger who meets us — in the grocery store, in the airport, or at the library — doesn’t know much of this. They see a cluster of two white adults and four Black children who fit the bill of being an adoptive family. They, of course, don’t know the whole story.we’ve faced many comments and questions — many of them some may deem curious.
There are multiple issues with the conclusion that adoption is a pretty, perfect package. First, as adoptive parents, we are not our children’s saints, saviors, or superheroes. The fact is, we chose adoption because we wanted to be parents. Given that I had a chronic, autoimmune disease that automatically equates to high-risk pregnancies, we knew that adoption was the right path for us to build our family. We didn’t go into adoption to “save” a child.
I will not ever share my children’s birth families’ personal information — but I will clap back at the birth parent assumptions and say that my children’s birth parents, whom we have ongoing relationships with, are wonderful people. We consider it an honor to be our kids’ chosen second, adoptive parents — and we hope that we will always have a bond with our kids’ first families.
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