Therapy was the key to validating this complex emotion.
Black women's anger has come with great consequences to our humanity, as we've seen culturally through the "Angry Black Woman" trope. This trope is pervasive in keeping Black women as the emotional caregivers of others while we remain robbed of our. Anger is an emotion that many of us have been socialized to swallow, bury inward.
Even before I stepped foot in a therapist's office, the weight of my own emotions and knowledge of this loaded history clouded my ability to focus solely on my healing. When I entered sessions, I carried the weight of a community's denial of their humanity by not being allowed the right to express our anger. But what surprised me was that, in finding a therapist that was a woman of color, I also found someonemuch of what I was feeling and carrying with me.
Through reevaluating my relationship with anger, I learned I am someone worth protecting, that my needs and desires matter, and that no matter what, I'm deserving of the space to feel all of the emotions that come with whatever comes my way. I feel with all of my emotions — including anger, perhaps especially anger — now than I ever have, and I don't think I could have gotten to this space without therapy.
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