I had made her eyes such a big deal that I had embarrassed her about them. She didn’t want to be different.
He assured me that it wasn’t me. He said she could have heard anyone remark about someone having pretty green eyes or blue and wished that she had been told the same. That made me feel a bit better, but I wasn’t finished.
I asked her older brothers if any of them had said anything to her about her eyes. They denied any wrongdoing. I believed them. They aren’t that kind of kids, and if they are going to make fun of someone, they would be ribbing on each other. They wouldn’t go after her. I was stumped. Then it dawned on me. She is the only one in our family of six with brown eyes. And they aren’t just brown; they are a rich chestnut with gorgeous sparkle. I am a bit obsessed with how beautiful they are. Yes, I remark about her “baby browns” all the time. She wanted eyes like her brothers, or maybe her dad and me. I tried to build her up so much that she became uncomfortable. I felt so dumb.
The same thing happened to me as a kid. I have had big breasts my entire life. Not like 36DD big, more like 38G. I was a double D in eighth grade. And the whole world let me know it. Once in grade school we were playing kickball and one of the boys in my class yelled to the teacher, “Don’t make her run or she’ll get two black eyes.” That was the end for me. I spiraled from that moment at age 12. Words hurt.If it really was me that hurt her, I needed to make a change.
I will do my best to let her know that she is unique and just as she was intended to be. There is no one like her, and she should be proud of everything about herself. I will be subtle but sincere with my compliments. And in my mind I will continue to gush over those baby browns, because they really are the prettiest that I have ever seen.
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