How pausing to ask yourself why you're feeling a certain way could improve—or save—your relationship
teaches us that many emotions result from “automatic thoughts” or thoughts that arise spontaneously and may not be accurate or helpful. In relationships, both partners experience automatic thoughts relating to the behaviors of the other, and sometimes those thoughts and related emotions lead to discord in the relationship. My father, Dr.Love is Never Enough
First, focus on what you can control. The bad news is that you cannot control your partner’s behavior or how they interpret your behavior. The good news is that you can control your own behavior and how you interpret your partner’s behavior. Ask yourself if there is any other plausible explanation for your partner’s behavior.
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