Help! My Husband Keeps Taking First-Class Airline Upgrades Without Me.

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Help! My Husband Keeps Taking First-Class Airline Upgrades Without Me.
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DearPrudie: I feel like he’s being very selfish, but he does not see it that way at all.

Most recently the situation came up again. They offered first class to both of us, as we were on the same reservation, but said they only had one seat. He jumped at it, presuming he would be the one to get it, and I snapped: No, we would stay in our seats. All times except the first time we were both in business class, just not first class, and these were cross-country red-eye flights.

I am, however, done joshing you and here to solve your problem. I have outlined a series of scenarios: I am sorry about your migraines. I do not think your husband can really do much to help. If this is a pattern of bulldozing your wishes, think about that.In the past three years, I lost all of my immediate family members to illness or other natural causes. Just this year, both of my parents passed within months of each other after long bouts with dementia. I was an only child.

Old friends are different, especially if they knew your parents. You should not worry about derailing those conversations, and you may gain comfort from giving them a little more information. They should also respect it when you don’t want to talk about it anymore. You could even just do an email update for close friends, if that’s easier. People understand that there is no “good time” to become an orphan. Anyone who whines that you should have told them directly is being a dick.

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