I went sober in my mid-twenties and became more confident at work and less anxious
A lifelong people pleaser, I've always struggled with wanting to belong. From my very first sip of alcohol in high school, drinking had been a way to fit in.
Looking for ways out of drinking, I found that fitness was a suitable excuse, so I signed up for a marathon every year. It's embarrassing to admit that I'd rather run 26 miles than muster up the confidence to say I didn't like alcohol.Even though I was living my dream life in New York City, I was anxious all the time. I tried therapy, meditation, vegetarianism, journaling, and a slew of other things to no avail.
While I was nervous at first, I realized that the people close to me didn't care. I sought ways to meet new people at workshops and panels where alcohol wasn't the main event. Learning how to show up anywhere and be comfortable without a drink made me more confident. I'm also fortunate that I'm comfortable being around alcohol, so I can attend events that a person in recovery from alcohol-use disorder could find challenging or impossible.Stopping drinking was a personal decision, so I never considered how it might affect my work life.
As the dates drew closer, my anxiety grew as I remembered how awkward I had felt in the past, spinning elaborate stories to explain why I wasn't drinking. To add to that, I hadn't met my coworkers in person before and knew Miami had a reputation for nightlife. "I don't drink," I said."I stopped a few months ago." To my surprise, I was met with my colleagues' acceptance and curiosity. Several people shared that they didn't drink either or were drinking less.Feeling as if I could bring my whole self to work and be accepted for it further boosted my confidence.
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