Does This Man Know How Childbirth Works?

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Does This Man Know How Childbirth Works?
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We can't un-hear the phrase “squish out a nugget”

Justin and Hailey Bieber Photo: Arturo Holmes/MG21/Getty Images Justin Bieber loves having sex with his wife so much that he is almost never not talking about it. The latest incident: In a new documentary called Justin Bieber: Our World, he reportedly expresses a desire to “squish out a nugget” with Hailey, which is to say, have a baby with her. And soon! According to the Sun, a tabloid that has reviewed this footage, Bieber wants to start working toward the big squish by the end of 2021.

To be clear, it’s not the timeline — nor the thought of their future child — I take issue with here. Frankly I am a little surprised they don’t have a kid already. For me, the ick factor lies in the phrase “squish out a nugget,” which is now echoing inside my brain barn with upsetting resonance. As Gawker observes, “it sounds like he’s looking to take a tiny little poop” with his beloved spouse, or something similarly visceral.

Anyway, accuracy aside, “squish out a nugget” is an extremely gross way to describe childbirth, if not totally unexpected. But I’m nonetheless vexed that I can’t un-hear it. Sorry for doing this to you.

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