Advice from Annie Lane.
: I have a friend who spent many years in an emotionally abusive relationship that seems similar to what “Sad Grandma” described. What I have seen with my friend’s children is that they have learned to treat their mom the same way their father did.
My friend is now working very hard to change her relationship with her children, and I hope “Sad Grandma” can, too. Remember: When you always put others first, you teach them to put you last.: Thank you for your letter. You bring up such an important point, which is that more is caught than taught. “The Gift,” a book by Edith Eger, highlights this very important lesson.My aunt relocated to Florida from Illinois with her husband.
I was very hurt by the way they treated me. And it is one of those lessons in life where we learn. I still do the polite things of sending birthday and Christmas cards, but the closeness is gone.
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