'That she even asked us to move to Montana felt like a bigger violation than when she cheated on me'
Illustration: Laia Arqueros Claramunt Welcome to It’s Complicated, a week of stories on the sometimes frustrating, sometimes confusing, always engrossing subject of modern relationships.
Tyler: I had this soulless job at a consulting firm, lived with three college buddies on the Upper East Side; it was all very typical and bro-ish. That was my crowd, but I was also a little different because I grew up on a farm in Ohio, and not in, like, Long Island. I saw Maddie and thought she was cute. She has really long, curly hair and I always liked girls with curly hair. She was shy, but I convinced her to give me her number.
Maddie: We moved in together fast because he was really sick with something that we thought was maybe a reoccurring flu or early stages of arthritis — and I wanted to help him. He felt so embarrassed that he was weak all the time. Then he got better. And somehow five years went by. We were pretty happy, overall. Sometimes we fought. We didn’t have a lot of sex because the relationship never started out as too sexual, since he was ill a lot.
Tyler: It’s funny because the night she was home for her reunion, I was out with a bunch of friends in New York. I was on antibiotics so I wasn’t drinking. There were women all over the place … and I just didn’t act on it … because I was sober that night. I think that would have been the night I cheated on her too, had I not been stone-cold sober. Regardless, it didn’t make the call easier.
Maddie: He never cared about my family. That was another thing. They asked about him all the time and he barely knew my nieces’ and nephews’ names. Tyler: This huge fight turned into like a week of not talking. It was also a week where I went out a lot and started looking around at women for the first time in about seven years. My brain was telling me it was time to start new.
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