For a commercial that excites and inspires the modern American consumer, add soap and cars.
As you prepare to film your very first commercial, you must choose if it is about soap or cars. Statistics show that ninety-eight per cent of American commercials are about soap or cars. The other two per cent are about a yearning for self-actualization that will never be realized.The commercial should include a man and likely a woman. The woman should remind us of our mothers. We should immediately think “soap” when we look into her eyes.
For commercials about soap, we recommend that you show the woman washing a pile of dishes. If your soap has traditional values, the woman should be smiling and the dishes should have Campbell’s tomato soup on them. If your soap is more progressive, the woman can be frowning; a copy of “The Bell Jar” may be visible in the vicinity of the sink.
For commercials about cars, we recommend that you show the car driving on a long, winding road. For reference, the road in your commercial should be the exact opposite of any given road in Cleveland, Ohio, where sixty-seven per cent of American citizens live. The winding road represents the unknowable economic future of a once great nation.
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